1 Timothy 1:12

Some days I wonder what on earth we were thinking to get ourselves into this crazy life...

Then I remember.

We said "Yes"...

To God. To His plan. To obedience.

Isn't that what I tell the children all day? We need to obey? To say "Yes"?

It doesn't mean that some days are not going to be hard. To seem like we need to just beg mercy from God for the next minute even. To ask again and again for Him to fill us up. For His love to just cover the major gaps of what we're missing. To praise Him on the front side of the battle and not wait for the end product, to praise Him for what His is not only doing, but for what He's planning to do. To trust Him to work all things out for good. For Him to bring Victory in His name for each of us.

The last couple days have been tough for me, I'm not exactly sure why. Both boys have slept all night for 3 nights in a row. Attitudes and reactions have really been pretty mellow... all in all things have been going pretty smooth. (With the exception of Friday night church--- oh my.)

I've been processing in my mind a lot of what has went on in the last month. The changes that have taken place. The differences we see in Riley and Halli and ourselves. How our life seems to have taken a complete flip over and now instead of being able to go and to do and to just "roll" with whatever seems to be happening at the time we're now staying, not doing, and planning, planning, planning... Grocery trips are a planned out thing, bank runs are thought out and somewhat organized... even a trip to the post office 1/2 mile from our house is an event that is a TREAT! Not to mention a trip to the car wash! ;)

Riley's adjustment continues to amaze us on a daily basis. We have to give all credit to God and the fact that Riley has been praying for this event for 2 1/2 years. For his two "brown brothers" that we didn't even know existed. God is very good and is so real to Riley. For that we are SO thankful.

Halli seems to be bouncing back pretty quickly and has re-instated her "silly laugh" when she's pleased. A few months ago she started doing this laugh that sounds rather sinister, to be quite honest... she throws back her head and just "haa haa haa haa's" to the best of her ability. She quit around the time the boys came home and is now back at it. She definitely seems to have grown up a bit, no longer as much "the baby."... (again, no, not in church, ahem)

Luke and I have been feeling like that fleeting glimpse we had of being "ok" parents is gone... we get to learn a WHOLE new style of life. One that's been feeling fairly foreign to us. Learning how to stay c-a-l-m... (yep, that's for me), not we were just totally hyped up all the time, but definitely a lot more reactive to situations--- {side note- maybe that's where Riley gets it?!} We're staying home WAY more now, we're having to ask and accept help instead of offering it. That's been a big one for me again, asking for help is really not my thing. I'd much rather offer to help someone than have someone offer to help me... then I feel guilty at not being able to do whatever it is myself. I have 2 wonderful gals who come and clean my house once a week. S-P-O-I-L-E-D! I have to keep repeating what I've been told- "Someone else can clean the house, cook the food, do the laundry, ect... but nobody else can be the Mom".

Good advice.

I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has strengthened me, because He considered me faithful, putting me into (this) service.

1 Timothy 1:12 NASB